The last week has not been an easy one... My treatment was increased to twice a month from November to December. I Introduced the 2nd treatment on Christmas Day for this month and immediately knew something was really wrong. I usually encounter side effects for 24 hours and then I experience weakness and gradually gain my strength back by day 2 and 3 after treatment. I can function during that time normally... Just tire easily etc. Today is December 29th and I am just now beginning to feel somewhat normal... I am still tired but that is improving. I think that having two a month is just too much on my body. I literally felt my body shutting down on the 27th. I was scared. I tried to stay awake all night so that I could make sure that I was alive and I was terrified if I fell asleep that I would not wake up... I was grateful for the loving words of encouragement that were sent to me via FB and Text.
We had lots of giggles here in the last week. On the 20th we got a visit from my mom and Pops and my mini me, Lola... They brought Christmas to us. It was so good to see them and get to put my arms around them and hug their necks. That is absolutely the best therapy... laughter, smiles, and hugs. It is not the same just talking with them on the phone. I am not complaining about all the phone calls we make, but having that physical touch of someones arms around your neck is one of the best feelings... Then, we had Granny Rita and David bring the boys home from GA. They went up with my mom and Pops when they left. I enjoyed a couple of days getting the rest of Christmas ready during that time.
The new tradition of Grandparent Christmas time on Christmas Eve began this year. It was nice to have a good meal, and a house full of people we love and the kids getting to open their presents from the grandparents. The best part was I did not have to cook Christmas... We had leftovers and plenty of them. The kids had the best Christmas... They all got new bikes and tons and tons of stuff... They were smiles a plenty :)
The boys remembered Jeff as well. We let go of a special star balloon with messages to him in Heaven. We goofed around and talked about how daddy loved deviled eggs and his pooting butt after... We talked about his love of Christmas and his need every year to pay it forward. He was so good at that. We paid it forward this year in his honor to a family that was in need and to a random person in town that was down on their luck. I know he smiled down from Heaven and he is always with us in our hearts.
Moving forward is a choice and we have lots of new memories to make and a lifetime to celebrate his love for life.
I am getting super excited about mine and Josh's engagement party in GA. I have some surprises for Josh while we are in GA. I can't wait. I am super excited !!!!
Much love to you all... Love the one you are with... Always say I love you and never ever have regrets... From our home in the boonies to you and yours... Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas and I wish you peace, love and light into the New Year...
Here's to 2014 may 2015 bring us the best year ever... CHEERS !!
Michelle, and the gang of H's and the Ptaks...
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