" All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another" - Anatole France

I have reflected on this poster " You know my name not my STORY " for a couple of weeks.  If you do not know my story, it is a direct reflection of my inability to convey it to you.  It has high points, low points, some places that I do not even want to look at again.  I try very hard to keep positive, be strong, go forward... My story however, had a pause if you will... a ; ( semi colon ) When an author uses a semi colon it is their choice to not end the sentence, but begin a new sentence.  A pause if you will...  My story, has a semi colon.  My wrist bears the mark of a tattoo of a semi colon.  I have hit on this point once in a blog I did a couple of months ago,  but decided this needs to be revisited for me.  

I had an amazing journey with Jeff... He was my rock, he grounded me, loved me unconditionally.  He wanted me to be happy and live.  I am living.  I am going forward.  We as a family are making changes, a lot of changes.  We are beginning to have more happy days than sad ones.  Do we miss Jeff?  Hell yea !!! 

Do not judge what we do, do not think you know what we are going through and learning how to survive.  You don't know !!! Love us from a distance if you can not be near us.  Understand that we can be happy again.  I am honoring Jeff in every way I can.  Raising our children the way he would be proud.  Being there for the older boys.  It is hard to wear both hats, especially when he was so " hands on " with all our kids and the ones that were not ours. 

So, bottom line, if you are in our lives, know we love you...  Your opinion of what we are doing right or wrong is " Not my Circus, Not my Monkeys"  Love that saying...  I do not believe in judging others for what they do in their lives.  We, however, are going to keep doing what we have to in order to get " happy happy happy "  The boys are doing well in School...  Justin is almost " in " at the Volunteer Fire Station and should start the Fire academy very soon...  Brett is doing well in Fort Myers and we miss him bunches.

Justin completed the 110 flights of stairs climbed in memory of 9-11 this past weekend.  I am so proud of him.  He had his heart in it and was training and completed it !!!  He has such a serving heart... Makes a mama proud !!! 

The little guys made tool boxes... I am sure that was a little gift from Jeff in Heaven...  of all the projects to make, it was a tool box...  They had a good time.  !!!

That brings me to this awesome guy...  He has been there for me in so many ways.  When I need to clear my head and just ride, he shows up... No questions asked.  He makes me laugh and he listens to me when I need to scream...  Mostly, he makes me smile !!!  I am so grateful to have him in my life... Love ya !!!

From my family to yours, Hope you all are doing well... We are... We will continue to go forward !! 

Love and Hugs,

Michelle and the Gang of H's