Girl Down at the Post Office.....



Blogging today very quickly, just to get this out of my head.  I am pretty tired.  Brett left to come here late last night and blew a tire at around 2 a.m and had to be towed... No spare tire, I know... let's not even go there...  anyway, awaiting his arrival...  So, seems when I am tired I tend to be much more emotional and reflective... 

I had to go to the post office and grab my mail and I had someone else's mail in my box, so I stood in line to hand it to someone at the actual counter and while I was standing there, I noticed this make-shift card holder holding greeting cards... Of course they were for " FATHER'S DAY "...  They could not have been clearance Mother's Day cards... Not today... So, I have a full on panic attack while in line at the post office.  I feel it coming on, I know I am about to go down and I can't shake it.  I move to the Island and lean for a second and try and collect myself and bam... down I go...  to the floor.  Several people rush over and check on me, I am trying to collect myself and can't... All I can do is point to the stupid ass display and cry and not breathe....  I finally get through it and throw the mail across the counter to the mail clerk and walk as fast as I can to my car...  sit in my car... and get more and  more pissed.  Really? in the post office?  I can't control this !!!!!  I try and then out of nowhere BAM !!!!! 

The positive side to this is that it has been several weeks since I have encountered one of these attacks that takes me hostage and renders me an idiot during the emotional breakdown in front of strangers...  I am making progress and that's what this is all about.  PROGRESS !!! 

I leave you with the quoted advise of a Widda Sista...


"You will work through your grief in your own way and in the amount of time you need. The operative word in that sentence is WORK, though. If you want to reach that “light at the end of the tunnel” YOU must participate in thoughts and activities that will continually move you one step closer to it."

Back in the saddle, ready for life...  Here I go !!

Hugs Love and Sandy Toes...